There May Be Something Truly Wrong with You

Hello Trueselfers,

With all your self-bitching and self-complaining, there may be something truly wrong with you!

Check out this week’s video to see what that is, and how you can stop it once and for all.

Please like and forward this video to whomever you feel needs to stop self-criticizing and find a new friend.

Love you trueself,

Toni Rebic, M.A., Psychologist

There May Be Something Truly Wrong with You

We spent an inordinate amount of time looking for our flaws, thinking about what we did wrong, berating ourselves for what we should’ve said, kicking ourselves for not taking that opportunity or making the call, Making ourselves feel bad because we didn’t live up to someone else’s standards or live up to our own expectations… Can you see the common denominator here? Can you see what can be wrong with you? (cue music)

Hi TrueSelfers, I’m Toni Rebic, lover of life and creator of TrueSelf Psychology –

With all your self-bitching, self-blaming, self-depreciating… Sometimes the only thing that is wrong with you is… the fact that you think something is wrong! How can you feel good about yourself if you are constantly in the habit of looking for mistakes, errors and pointing the finger at yourself with so much judgment. How can you appreciate yourself when you become your worst critic?

This is not to say that you may not have attributes to work on, or personal skills to develop – obviously we need to keep working on ourselves to improve. The issue, rather, is the way you go about doing it.

I know when you come to my office, and tell me all that’s wrong about you, you think it’s real. You tell me about all yours flaws, faults, and problems that point to the fact that you are not good enough and there is something dysfunctional about you, almost irreparable, unredeemable!… Might as well just give up and be done with you right now! lol

I have clients telling me all the time – “I must be the worse case you’ve seen”

And guess what? They are probably be the third person that day to tell me that!

From my perspective: All I hear is someone beating themselves down. Someone who’s treating themselves worse than they would treat anyone else.

[How do you treat a friend in need?]

Let me ask you, when a friend comes to see you with their problems, do you respond to them by beating them down? Pointing the finger at everything they’ve done wrong? Criticizing them for the mess in their lives?  Well, if you do, you won’t be their friend for much too long.

So basically the problem is not that you have issues to deal with, the problem is that you criticize yourself for having them. Well welcome to humanity! A place where you must learn to unlearn certain past conditionings and better yourself.

So how would you really treat a friend if they came to see you with their problems?

In all likelihood, you would encourage them, see the good in them, tell them everything that they’re doing ok, help them see the bigger picture, help them get unstuck from the negative and start pointing to the positive… Or at the very least, take them out [P] for a movie or buy them a beer [P]. Now how would you think that friend would feel after spending this quality time with you? They would probably feel better about themselves and be in a better place to handle their problems. And see you as a good friend.

Now, what do you think would happen if you reacted towards yourself in the same way[?] next time you have an issue to deal with?

I bet you would discover a friend within you never knew you had.

So be true to yourself… and become your best friend.

[Funny pic – person hugging themselves – I love me!]

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